"ya think?!"

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Location: confusion -ALWAYS!, Canada

1/2 human other 1/2 -unknown 30'something and wife of 1 mother of 2

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

I'm a scrapper without a camera!

Is that even possible? I mean to not have a camera? Ours seen it's death today :( it's nearly 9 years old and Ally threw it on the floor and I'm pretty sure it's now officially cooked! the on/off switch is now being held on by a 'thread'.

just sharing a pic of Heidi and I {below} She's upgraded to free time in the sunroom :D yah!!

time to go put #2 to bed (dh-#1, ds-#2, dd-#3, LOL)

Monday, November 27, 2006


I am SO not liking my life today. My kids hate me... I just KNOW IT! they are mean and they are just testing me to the limit. Dawson a little more specifically. He started off before my FREAKIN' eyes were even open. I think it wouldn't be half a battle if I was permitted to sleep ALL NIGHT without being interrupted by 'darling' Ally! GRrrrrrrrrrrrrr.... And of course neither one of them 'GET IT' ....hmm, Mommy is pretty grumpy, maybe if we LISTENED to her, she'd be more nice to us. NOoooooooooooooooooooooooooo, let's just run amok and really get her riled.

SO what am *I* doing on the computer you ask??? TRYING to keep from FREAKING out on them!

I don't know why I'm not just walking out the door!

Sunday, November 26, 2006

where'd the weekend go???

Man! before you even KNOW that it *IS* the weekend, it's already over! :(
I think that work days should be SAT/SUN and weekends should be MON-FRI! :D
~wishful thinking eh?

So I have red highlights now :D thought why not... and I have layers again too!
I got some Christmas shopping done yesterday still have lots to go. I have a WACKY idea of taking the kids and trying to do some one day -I KNOW that's setting myself up for disaster.

I decided to try to quit yelling so much. I'll see how it goes... so far I did have one instance and I remained in control... did NOT yell.

pretty pathetic to talk about such crap eh? ~hey, YOU'RE the one reading it! :P

I scrapbooked this evening. it's funny I always claim to want to scrap with other people, but then when I have people to scrap with they just end up bugging me I think it's just that the people I WANT to scrap with live TOO far away :(
-although Kim and I haven't scrapped in a LONG time- hey Kim, what are you doing this thursday?

I gave the pup a bath today, she's doing pretty good. [knock on wood] unfortunately I've been kenneling her a bit more b/c of too many 'accidents'. She is amazing with watching/following and that sort of thing. Sometimes we're quite literally tripping over her...

k, enough rambling

***Shannon sending you all my love and hugs, I sure hope you ate a good supper! and try to get some good sleep! Praying lots for you {HUGE Hugs}

Friday, November 24, 2006

"the grass is all white mom"

Dawson noticed the frost on the grass this a.m and told me that it meant we couldn't mow it anymore. ~I would LOVE to think like a kid again~ their logic is SO different than anything in the world ...and amazingly enough at times it does make sense!

This morning we had our visiting dog (Abby-GSx) show up, and she decided for who knows what reason, to come down on Heidi. I know that Heidi is EXTREMELY excited -she is only like 10 weeks old, Abby is an old fart I think she's like 9 but acts like she's 900! Anyway now Heidi is really minding her manners so maybe it was a helpful gesture ;) nodoggy was injured just a few hurt feelings I think.

It's funny at night while I'm laying in bed I think of a million things that I would love to blog about, and then like I had my memory erased I can't recall a single thing by the time I
sit down for blog.

So today should be fun... I am going to get my hair done -it's been a while! I'm thinking about colouring it rather than "just" highlights -but I'm still not certain. Then I have to be back to drop Ally off before Dawson gets off the bus and be home before he gets home... We have Steve's work Christmas dinner this evening... it's in a crappy area in the city {I'm not exactly a fan of the "best" parts of the city let alone any of the core parts} oh well... one evening. I'm hoping to get out to have some MUCH NEEDED me time tomorrow, but that isn't certain either. And mom and I are hoping to go shopping in Buffalo next Saturday... not sure tho.

hmm... what else?

Oh, I want to do some calculations for the cost of one of the places we looked at (actually the first place) so see how much it will be to have it finished. I'm tired today ....but not grumpy ;)

Wednesday, November 22, 2006


NOT yet, but if these kids and puppy keep at me long enough I sure will be!

MAN ALIVE! they are just NONE freakin' stop.

I feel like we're in a shoebox these days and I get not a SECOND of MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE time

ok, it's official for Christmas I want a plane ticket to CALIFORNIA! {one way?}

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

stoopid batteries!!

Ok, I know it's more like *stooooopid" me! but it seems like the batteries for my camera are ALWAYS dead.... even when I charge the second set, I put them in the camera bag and low and behold the set in the camera will need to be charged, so I get the 2nd set out -that are suppose to be charged- and they're dead too?!?! what the heck??? Somebody should invent batteries that just don't go dead!

I have a TON of stuff to do today, including making a postal trip! Better go grab a bit and get on with the day!! :)

Monday, November 20, 2006

never thought monday would be a GOOD day...

thankfully it *IS* monday! I don't usually enjoy mondays... but after a crappy weekend, I'm glad it's over!

WE have been doing NOTHING the past couple days. Ally has a sinus-thing going on still {altho she seems to be in good spirits} Dawson has somehow remained untouched by it... knock on wood. He has school tomorrow -shh!! but YAH!!! :D I think I need a break from him for a day ;)

nothing really much to say... not much has changed around here. I really need to get some knick knack stuff packed up and away.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

a MUCH better day...

Ok, I'm exagerating a bit... we all feel tired and have a crappy sinus/throat aches and pains cold but compared to yesterday over all... today is better.

I was right tho' he came home drunk -grr... but we ended up going out just the same. And surprisingly I ended up putting my faith in God to let us have an enjoyable evening. My mom watched the kids [very last minute] and Steve and I went to Tucker's Marketplace. It's one of the few buffet restaraunts around. -that isn't all chinese food- Steve's meal was free since it was his birthday good thing since it was $19.99/pp. Crazy! they use to have the BEST salad bar but now it's ...not as good. They added all these weird salads (noodle, potato, rice, humus etc) and cut WAY back on the add on's to the *normal* salad. ANYWAY it was just really nice to be out with Steve even tho' he was on another planet. At least he said what was on his mind... usually we'll go out and hardly say 'boo' to one another.

I made a cake for him, and we had some for breakfast :P

Saturday, November 18, 2006

started Christmas shopping

~Happy Birthday to my hubby!~

Well, yesterday I started the shopping. I'm not sure why but it seems like we have a bit less to buy this year. I think it's just my imagination tho'... I didn't get much done but I did at least start!
I also found a crappy cold...I even used the stupid purel {hand sanitizer}

We are suppose to go to Noah's birthday drop in and to some friends for an open house today but I really don't feel like doing anything. Our house is a mess :( Ally is cranky and also has a sinus thing going on. Dawson is miserable -what else is new? and not to mention it IS Steve's birthday and he's off to his parents house helping with pork today. I just want to sleep and it's NOT possible. *sigh*

The dog is even tired if you can imagine that!

I think I'm going to ask for a maid service for Christmas.

~edited here to add more~

Grrr.... I am totally bitchy! My poor little kids. Dh has been gone ALL freaking day. I mean ya I do have the truck and I do have both car seats so I am not 'stranded' here, but Ally and I both are feeling *icky* and I just don't have the desire to be going anywhere really. It is Steve's birthday and he literally spent like 3 hours with us? geez... I can tell that Dawson is a bit hurt, especially b/c he was expecting a birthday party as a 4 year old would! He is playing outside by himself :( I am having that "I just want to run away" feeling :( I HATE this.

Thursday, November 16, 2006

kids + dogs = CRAZY JEN!

I'm going mental... the kids are driving me nuts! I enjoy puppyhood, but I seriously can't wait for Heidi to be grown up!!!

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

tired again... or still?

I am so stupidly tired... I don't know if I'm coming or going. I haven't been on the computer much at all lately, and the few minutes that I am on here, I'm just reading and not wanting to say much.

I think puppy is draining whatever ounce of energy I had left... it will be totally worth it tho :)

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

the trees are bare

It's Tuesday and OMGosh what a night/morning! grrr... Dawson *must* have some serious issues that we don't know about. He hasn't been sleeping very good at ALL... he's been waking up and wanting to sleep with us {ugh} so on top of already waking through the night with Ally now I have Dawson too. I think Steve must have finally got the hint that I just couldn't deal with it all, he started making Dawson go back to bed. WELL! last night was a disaster! Daws had a full all out tempter tantrum at 1:45 in the morning. Needless to say he woke Ally up, shit, he could have woke up the dead! He finally gave up and went back to bed, I laid in his bed until he fell asleep. Man, it's frustrating. Then no sooner did I go back to my bed and started to drift to sleep then Ally woke up! Might as well have had a sign that said PARTY at our house! {{I'm a bit tired today}}
Dawson put up another fight to get ready for school, then another when it was time to catch the bus, but the odd part of it all is as soon as he is in "public" or around most other people he acts totally human ~I just don't get it!

So I have a million things to do today. Not even sure where to begin.

Sunday, November 12, 2006

Ally and Heidi

Just wanted to post a picture of my baby girl with my Princess :)

Life Update

Heidi's first night was a success! She slept in the kennel and we didn't hear a peep out of her! She is AMAZING! I love her... Daisy is 'warming' up to her, she is acting totally like a cat~ {she's our 7-1/2 yo Jack Russel} I think it'll take time... and someday she MIGHT tolerate her ;)

So the house hunting... bleh! We went and seen the 2 houses that I mentioned, the one is totally too small for us. The other one is good. I just decided that I was NOT going to get my hopes up. I had a sneaky suspicion that Steve was going to just sit idle on discussing it... he is DETERMINED that he is planning and *at least* figuring out the cost of building {HUGE -eyeroll} I can see that we'll be either renting again, or scrambling at the last minute to buy -whatever is left- in May.
I've just decided to devote my time to the other priorities [God, Steve, kids & my friends] b/c no matter HOW much I get worked up and upset about housing it doesn't solve or help anything! So I'm just going to start packing up stuff that we aren't using and won't be needing ie. decor and 'junk' ;) and when the right thing comes along, I'll just be ready.

I feel happy these days... of course this is very recent and could quite possibly be a temporary feeling but I'm going to hang on to it tight! I know that Heidi is a HUGE reason I'm feeling so happy. I have wanted a puppy like her for a LONG time. I am almost still in 'awe' that I finally have her!! I think that she could quite possibly help me with my depression -getting outside is always a struggle. In the past 12 hours I bet I've been out with her playing etc. than I have in a week! :P I know that sun and fresh air will do us ALL a bundle of good. Going to upload more pics of her :)

Saturday, November 11, 2006



I've been searching high and low for a german shepherd (long hair preferred) I haven't been able to find any that 'stole' my heart. Until I met Heidi... I wasn't sure of what I wanted to name her and since my one plea was "she can be my Christmas present" I was contemplating a Christmas name -like NOEL- but decided that was kinda ...gay! so I thought some more and always liked the names; Candy, Tessa, Tea, but then for some reason I came up with Heidi! I think it suites her perfectly, she likes to HIDE too! :D

She is going to be a HUGE dog!!! ~I hope!~ Look at the size of those PAWS!!! and she's only 8 weeks old! I am SO excited... bet ya couldn't tell eh?

Daisy is a total bitch to her... but WHATever! she can get over herself....

Thursday, November 09, 2006


I'm BEGGING... I'm at the end of my wits!!!

I have done all I can do to remain ~somewhat~ open to being calm about this house CRAP! :P 2 more houses are up for sale and totally in our price range. The one is 'o.k' the other one is OMGOSH!!! I am going to cry if we don't buy it! Steve is going to be really in the dog house if we do not at LEAST put in an offer on this house.

pray, pray hard ~please, I'm going to go insane if this slips by.


Wednesday, November 08, 2006

46 days til Christmas

can you believe I haven't even put a DENT into my shopping yet? I think I'm going to pull a Steve this year. I don't know why, but I am just NOT in any sort of celebrating kinda mood. I think altho' hate to admit this, but I am almost certain that it's weighing quite heavily on my mind this entire moving crap. If I could just get Steve in the same ball game, we can negotiate what field to play on... sigh, he is trying SO hard to convince me that we should consider building. I just want to scream. Sure it would be GREAT if we had the time and not to mention some uh... money? We are looking at 6 months and we're going to be moving. I went ahead and scheduled an appt. to see 2 places that just got listed this week, and {salivate} one has a hot tub!! :)

Not to mention are also within walking to Dawson's school... I'm just going to keep praying ~seems like I keep tripping on opportunities but Steve keeps hitting the trees! The right thing WILL come along...

I'm feeling like absolute yucka! it's not fun... I can't WAIT til friday -hopefully it'll be OVER!

ugh, also found out saturday is chicken day [bleh!]

the fun just never ends {{serious eyeroll}}

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

I hate being a woman! :P

...you can go ahead and guess why! grrr... I just want to rip off heads... CHEW vigorously and SPIT!

sigh... I can't wait til friday ----is it here YET?

I need a house, and my own SPACE!

...grumble grumble... I hate mornings

I don't really understand what it is that Steve and Dawson can't function QUIETLY and smoothly in the morning together. I mean, sheesh, I'm up 1/2 the night with Ally, then Dawson hasn't been sleeping all night, and comes crawling into my bed sometime around 4-5am? *yawn* Would it seriously be too much for them to just quietly and quickly get up, dressed and out the door without disturbing the 'queen & her princess' {har har}
Steve likes to ASK Dawson what he wants for his lunch and breakfast... HELLO??? the kid is 4 it's not a matter of question. You make it and he eats it! the end.
I weighed him last night, that little man is 56lbs!!! he's SOLID too.

did I mention that I'm tired?

So my mom and sister are coming today, not sure I think it's a great idea but I would like to see them, just not necessarily today. I like to spend my days doing things that I can't necessarily do with both kids home. Today I had planned to ask mil to watch ally for a bit so I could clean our house... I still might, depending on how long mom and sis stay -did I mention sis has 3 kids...

Last thing before I get off of here... {to Shannon}
I'm praying for you, that you will have the strength to get through the dr. visit today, that the news will be the best possible. I wish I could be there with you to help get through all this. Sending my love...

Monday, November 06, 2006

in a funk

I haven't been on the computer for a while... I retrieved 23 emails yesterday {I haven't been online since Friday!} only 2 of them touched my heart. One friend just got engaged and another found out she has cancer. My heart sunk when I read about it.... my knees felt weak and I just wish I could send her some magic. The best I can do is offer all my love, prayers and support. I know she will get through this... SHE BETTER! {{{{{{{huge love Shan}}}}}}}

today Steve and I have been married for 7 years, and we married on the 6th anniversary of our first date. [that means we've been together for 13 years] ;)

We have a very rare and unique relationship... We've been kinda not really seeing eye to eye lately, but I guess that's just par for the course -we're involved in house hunting... ugh! it's NOT fun.

I just don't feel that I have much to say right now... maybe later.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006


man alive it just hit me that's it's 2006 and now in 2 months it's going to be over already!

I just did the stooooooooopidest thing and I can't believe I'm even going to write about it. I just pretty much filled the house up with smoke :( even set off the fire alarm!!!! there was a backdraft of smoke in the woodstove and well... it started billowing out even with it all closed up. I am so yucked up with smoke that my coffee tasted SO bad I dumped not one but both cups out :( I don't have a cough or anything from it, but my taste buds are screwed up right now... {insert L}

wth? some buddy, jis walking down the road in construction gear from head to toe and looks kinda... creepy... oh, nevermind... they're doing cold patch on the road :P

So I have to take Dawson to the dr. in 1/2 hour to see what the little spots are all about... It was suggested that it could be the detergent so I'm definitely going to change that. He use to have reactions when he was a babe, and we ended up using TideFREE so I guess we'll be digging a little deeper for laundry soap again. oh well :) -better than wasting it on beer! :P

it's darn cold out today! wooohooo they're calling for snow the next couple days too ;)